So it looks like NBA players are wearing buzzers too.
That’s the real question isn’t it. Why would an NBA player need to where a buzzer? What kind of information is being relayed to them? Before you make up your mind and decide that NBA players are definitively not wearing some type of buzzer, let me direct your eyes to something.
King James himself wearing a wire under his Lakers jersey. A wire that appears to be going right up to his nipple, delivering a nice sensual buzz every time one of his coaches want to alert him of something. I don’t kink shame. Some people like nipple clamps and some low voltage electricity in the bedroom, but LeBron does his love making on the court. This explains why LeBron was happy to flash his dick in the 2015 NBA finals, but much like Altuve he keeps his nips under wraps. If James can play world class basketball with jumper cables on his nipples, imagine what it takes to really get him going between the sheets.
We’ve established that clearly LeBron does wear a buzzer, but we can only speculate on what his coaches are trying to signal him? When to shoot? Definitely possible. When he is help defense? Potentially. When someone is setting a screen on him? Could be. When his teammates are about to screw up? Unlikely, otherwise he would have been electrocuted to death last year. It’s hard to say exactly what advantage its giving him but it’s certainly working as the Lakers has the 2nd best record in the league.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Alex Cora and LeBron James both played in Cleveland in 2005 and now are both part of #Buzzergate. They hatched their master plans 15 years ago and we are just now finding out. This scandal now involves two major sports. What’s next? The Patriots are illegally using video cameras to steal signs too? Seems unlikely but you never know.
The NBA needs to figure out how long this has been going on. Does the league need to take away the only good thing that’s ever happened to the city of Cleveland? The city would probably burn itself down if that happened. I don’t know if we would notice the difference but it sounds dangerous. What about the Miami titles? D Wade gets his booty eaten nonstop so we know a nipple buzzer wouldn’t phase him. He could easily be in on this too.
As fans of the Association we should demand a report from Adam Silver. Who knows how the landscape of the league could have been different if there weren’t cheaters out there. At least we know there are some honest teams in the NBA like the Kings, the Hawks, the Knicks, the Hornets, the Pistons, the Magic, and the Timberwolves. Thank you for your honesty, and your courage, and for standing up to deception and dishonesty, even if it meant being a dumpster fire.
We’re on to you LeBron, and your pal Alex Cora. Might want to keep the nipple buzzers in the sex drawer from now on.
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