On to San Francisco

New Orleans scared me. Seattle scares me. Green Bay makes me nervous. San Francisco? I’m not afraid (turns on Eminem). Does Jimmy G’s handsome ass scare me at quarterback? No. Does Kyle Shanahan’s slightly less handsome ass keep me up at night? Nope. The Vikings have to travel to California in the middle of a Minnesota winter (sucks for them) and play a 49ers team full of guys who probably drink kombucha and make their own granola. Meanwhile, Everson Griffen is in the north woods hunting white tail deer with his bare hands, and Anthony Barr is slamming back a 30 rack of PBR while taking a break from pulling Muskies through 8 inches of ice in 0 degree weather.

I don’t care how warm your weather is, or how good your granola may be, Minnesota has the edge here. It’s the playoffs, it time for physical football, and the Vikings will physically dominate the 49ers. I mean Raheem Mostert is 5′ 10″ 205 lbs (I remember 8th grade), Linval Joseph might literally eat him.

San Francisco certainly has talent, but Minnesota just played one of their best overall games of the season, against a Super Bowl contender, and seems to be peaking at the perfect time.

Joe Dirt may have been a janitor for a California radio station but Kirk Dirt is the custodian for the Minnesota Viking offense, and he looks ready to take out his broom and sweep the San Francisco 49ers out of the playoffs and back to their surfboards at Ocean Beach.

Skol. Kombucha stinks.

Published by G Spot Sneakers

Follow me on twitter ( @ZimNeedsANewOC ) to interact, get the latest blogs, and hear my thoughts on the Vikings and everything sports related. Currently trying to lure free agents with tweets. Teddy Bridgewater stan. Love me a good GIF. Extremely serious at all times.

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